Traditional Down-Down Songs

(Arranged alphabetically)

 BRITISH SAILOR
Melody - Reuben, Reuben, I've Been Thinking
Note: Should be sung in high voice with accent

Yankee calls me honey baby
British calls me fucking whore 

Yankee knocks upon my window
British kicks in fuckin' door

Yankee cocks are sometimes limpy
British cocks, they leave me sore

Yankee lays me on a pillow
British fucks me on the floor

Yankee tender kissed my nipples
British licks my pussy raw

Yankee treats me like his mother
British fucks me on all fours

CHAPPED HIDE
Melody - Rawhide

Ballin', ballin', ballin',
That boy he keeps on callin',
His crabs, they keep on crawlin',
Chapped hide!

You thought he was the right one,
But he was a one-night stand one,
He's shootin' blanks with his gun,
Chapped hide!

Pick him up, take him home, ride him hard, make him moan!
Wake him up, saddle up, Send him home!
Chapped hide . . . Yee Haw!!

DOES A HASHER?
Melody - Do Your Balls Hang Low? 

Does a hasher like to walk,
Does a hasher like to run,
Does a hasher like to be where they're having all the fun?
Can he drink a 12-ounce beer,
While his friends all sing and cheer,
Now your time has come.
So drink it down, down, down . . .

 DOUGH, RAY, ME
Melody - Do, Re, Mi (Sound of Music)

Dough, the stuff, that buys me beer,
Ray, the guy who serves me beer,
Me, the guy, who drinks me beer,
Fa, a long way to the bar,
So, I'll have another beer,
La, I'll have another beer,
Tea, no thanks I'll have a beer,
And that brings us back to,
Beer Beer Beer . . . (etc)

DOWN DOWN DOWN YOUR BEER
Melody – Row Row Row Your Boat

Down Down Down your beer,
To pay for your crime.
Quit complaining about the taste,
There's no sperm this time. 

DOWN DOWN DITTY 

Put it to your lips
Give the Mug a tip
Don’t just take a sip
Drink it down, down ,down . . . 

 GET IT UP, GET IT IN . . .
Melody - Bonanza Theme

Get it up, get it in, get it out don't mess my hair do
You've got a dick but you should lick, move that tongue around
Hit the spot, make me hot
I will scream out loud

Get it up, get it in, get it out don't mess my hair do
You've got a dick but you should lick, move that tongue around
Suck my toes, insert your hose
Make my juices flow

 Get it up, get it in, get it out don't mess my hair do
You've got a dick but you should lick, move that tongue around
When I am done and I have cum
We'll start another round

 Get it up, get it in, get it out don't mess my hair do
You've got a dick but you should lick, move that tongue around

 GLORIOUS, VICTORIOUS (BEER, BEER, BEER)

Beer, beer, beer, beer
Beer, beer, beer, beer
Drunk last night,
Drunk the night before,
Gonna get drunk tonight,
Like I've never been drunk before,
Cause when I'm drunk I'm as happy as can be,
Cause we're all part of the Hash House family.

 Oh the Hash Family
Is the best family
To ever
Come over
From Old Germany.

There's the High Hash Drunks
There's the Low Hash Drunks
There's the Asian Drunks
And the other damn drunks.

 CHORUS:
Singing glorious,
Victorious!
Hey!!! One keg of beer for the four of us.
Singing Glory be to God that there are no more of us,
Cause one of us could drink it all alone
Damn near, pass the beer, to the rear, of the Hash House Harriers!

GOD BLESS MY UNDERPANTS
Melody - God Save the Queen (God Bless America)

 God bless my underpants,
Brand that I like,
Stand inside them,
And ride them,
Between my buns when I run or I bike.

 From the waistband,
To the leg holes,
To the fly flap,
Wet with piss,
God bless my underpants,
They look like this.

 HASH HOUSE HARRIERS
Melody - Addams Family Theme

   Their drinking is compulsive and
   Their running is convulsive,
   They're morally repulsive,
   The Hash House Harriers.

CHORUS:
Da da da da (snap fingers twice)
Da da da da (snap fingers twice)
Da da da da, da da da da, da da da da

Their flatulence is rude and
Their genitals protrude when
They're running in the nude in
The Hash House Harriers.

They're always shiggy tracking
From constantly bush-whacking,
Intelligence they're lacking,
The Hash House Harriers.

 Da da da da, Down Down, etc . . .

 HERE'S TO ________ (BASIC DOWN-DOWN SONG)     
Melody - Itself

VERSION # 1 (line variations)
Here's to__________,
He's true blue, (he's a blue)
He's a Hasher,
Through and through,
He's a pisspot, (he's an asshole)
So they say,
Tried to go to heaven, (he'll never get to heaven)
But he turned out gay, (but he went the other way / in a long, long way)
So drink it down, down, down  . . .

VERSION #2
Melody - Ach, Du Lieber Augustin

Here's to brother (sister) hasher,
Bother hasher, brother hasher,
Here's to brother hasher,
May he chug-a-lug.
He's happy, he's jolly,
He's fucked up by golly,
Here's to brother hasher,
May he chug-a-lug.

So drink motherfucker,
Drink motherfucker,
Drink motherfucker,
Drink motherfucker,
Here's to brother hasher,
May he chug-a-lug.

 Variation:
Here's to Brother Johnny, brother Johnny, brother Johnny,
Here's to brother Johnny who's with us tonight.
He beats it, he eats it, he often mistreats it,
Here's to Brother Johnny who's with us tonight.

HE'S THE MEANEST
Melody - Itself (similar to Okinawa HHH melody) 

He's the meanest,
He sucks the horse's penis,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.

All he does is pound it,
Ever since he found it,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.

He's always pissing on us,
He's rotten and dishonest,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.
So drink it down, down, down . . .

Variation:
She's superior,
She's got class,
She's superior,
She's a horse's ass.
Drink it down, down, down . . . 

HE WANKS HIS CRANK
Melody - Itself

He wanks his crank in the morning
He wanks his crank in the night
He wanks his crank with his left hand
and he cleans it up with his right. 

HER LEFT TIT
Melody - My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean 

Her left tit hangs down to her belly,
Her right tit hangs down to her knee.
If her left tit did equal her right tit,
She'd get lots of weenie from me.
Drink it down, down, down . . .

HIS ONE-SKIN
Melody - My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean 

His one skin hangs down to his two skin,
His two skin hangs down to his three,
His three skin hangs down to his foreskin,
His foreskin hangs down to his knee.
Drink it down, down, down . . .

 OPTIONAL VERSES:
Roll back, roll back,
Roll back his foreskin for him, for him.
Roll back, roll back,
Please roll back his foreskin for him.

I LIKE COCK
Melody - Three Blind Mice

I like cock,
I like cock,
See how they rise,
See how they rise,
They fit so nicely and feel so grand,
They come in all sizes, all shapes and brands,
There's nothing finer than making them stand,
'Cause I like cock,
I like cock.

I LIKE CUNT
Melody - Three Blind Mice

I like cunt,
I like cunt,
Ain't it cute,
Ain't it cute?
Up against railings I've often stood,
Fucking young ladies and doing them good,
It's so much better than pulling your pud,
'Cause I like cunt,
I like cunt. 

I LOVE BEER
Melody – Barney Theme Song

I love Beer,
Can't you see?
When I drink I am happy!
Pale Ale, Dark Lager, tasty foamy brew,
I lift my glass and drink to you! 

IT’S A SMALL DICK
Melody - It's a Small World  

Well it isn't long and it isn't thick,
It gets hard too slow and it cums too quick,
It gets lost in her twat,
But it's all that he's got,
It's a small, small, dick.

It's a small dick after all,
It's a small dick after all,
Always limp from alcohol,
It's a small, small, dick!  

Japanese Keitai Song (MOshi, Moshi)
Melody London Bridges Falling Down                                 (Translation)

Moshi, Moshi ano, Ne!     もしもしあのね！              (Hello, Hello ummm!)
Ano ne! Ano ne!               あのね！あのね！              (Ummm let’s see!)
Moshi, Moshi ano, Ne!     もしもしあのね！              (Hello Hello ummm)
Asshole desu ka?.           ああそですか。                  (Are you an asshole?)

 LOVE ME TENDER
Melody - Love Me Tender

Love me tender, love me sweet
Wrap your lips around my meat
Watch me smile and watch me grin
As the cum rolls down, down, down, down, down etc . . . 

KINOKO SONG (THE MUSHROOM SONG)
Melody- Itself                                                     (Translation)

Kinoko no ko                   茸のこ                  (Mushrooms shroom shroom）
Noko Genki kinoko          のこ元気のこ       (Horny Mushrooms shroom shroom)
Asa Dachi Mai Nichi        朝だち毎日          (Everyday having morning wood)
Buchi Sugoii                   ぶち凄い              (Is so so very good)

MASTURBATION
Melody – Alouette

 (Song to a male)
Masturbation, he loves masturbation
Masturbation, it's what he loves to do
First he'll use his right hand
Then he'll use his left hand
Right hand
Left hand
Right hand
Left hand
Masturbation, it's what he'd rather do.
So drink it down down down down . . .

(Song to a female)
Masturbation, we love masturbation
Masturbation, it's what we love to do
First we'll use our thrree fingers
Then we'll use our dildo
Three Fingers
Dildo
Three Fingers
Dildo
Masturbation, while thinking about you.
So drink it down down down down . . . 

MEET THE HASHERS
Melody - Flintstones Theme     

Hashers, meet the hashers,
They're the biggest drunks in history,
From Iwakuni, Ni- Hon,
They're the leaders in debauchery.
Half minds, trailing shiggy through the years,
Watch them as they down a lot of beers,
Down down, down down down down,
Down down down down down down down down down,
Down down, down down down down,
Down down down down down down down down down. 

PUT YOUR LEFT LEG OVER MY SHOULDER
Melody - Side by Side 

Put your left leg over my shoulder,
Put your right leg over my shoulder,
(wag tongue between a V sign made with 2 fingers)
La la la la la, la la la la, la la la.

Put your left tit over my shoulder,
Put your right tit over my shoulder,
(shake head)
Bla bla bla bla bla, bla bla bla bla, bla bla bla. 

SEX IS BORING
Melody - Frère Jacques

Sex is boring,
Pain is fun,
Gonna cut my fingers off,
One by one . . .

Sex is boring,
Pain is fun,
Pulling out my pubic hairs,
One by one . . .

Sex is boring,
Pain is fun,
Poking out my eyes,
One by one . . .

Sex is boring,
Pain is fun,
Cutting off my gonads,
One by one . . .

 SHORT HYMN
Melody – Amen (with reverence) 

Hymn, hymn, (Her, her,)
Fuck him . . . (Fuck her . . .)

 SOLDIER SONG
Melody - Itself

Asshole, asshole, a soldier I will be,
To piss, to piss, two pistols on my knee,
For cunt, for cunt, to fight for my country,
Asshole, asshole, asshole, asshole,
A soldier I will be.
Drink it down, down, down . . .

 SOUND OF HASHERS
Melody - Do, Re, Mi (Sound of Music) 

Give (name) a beer, a really big beer,
We will watch him drink it down.
Girls, you know if he drinks it all,
He will never get it up.
Oh, the stories sad to tell,
It picked up and then it fell.
You would die if you could see,
(name), slap his tiny wee-wee.

THANK GOD SHE FINALLY SHUT UP
Melody - Looney Tunes Theme 

Thank God she finally shut up,
She's always fuckin' bitchin',
Now drink your beer, get out of here,
Get back into the kitchen!

 THERE WAS A LITTLE BIRD
Melody - Itself 

There was a little bird,No bigger than a turd,
A-sittin' on a telephone pole.
He ruffled up his neck,
And shit about a peck,
He puckered up his little asshole.
(point at violators): Asshole, asshole, asshole, asshole,
He puckered up his little asshole. 

THEY OUGHT TO BE PUBLICLY PISSED ON
Melody - My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean 

They ought to be publicly pissed on,
They ought to be publicly shot,
They ought to be tied to a urinal,
And left there to fester and rot,
Drink it down, down, down . . .

THIS IS YOUR DOWN-DOWN SONG
Melody - Ta-Rah-Rah-Boom Te-Ay 

This is your Down-Down song,
It isn't very long. . . .drink it down down down

 THE TIRED HASHER
Melody – Itsy Bitsy Spider 

The tired White Snake Hasher,
Went trudging up the hill,
Stopped at the Beer Check,
And there he drank his fill,
And when the trail was over,
His shoes were muddy brown.
Though he was drunk already,
He had to drink it down, down, down, down . . .

WHO NEEDS SEX?
Melody - Three Blind Mice

(sung to harrier)
Who needs sex?
Who needs sex?
It's no fun,
It's no fun,
You chase after women and what do you get?
You grumble and fumble and break out in sweat,
You wake up at daylight just deeper in debt,
So who needs sex?
Who needs sex?

 Who needs sex?
Who needs sex?
It's no fun,
It's no fun,
You meet a new women and go on a date,
You hug and you kiss and you think that it's great,
She gives you blue balls and you masturbate,
So, who needs sex?

(sung to a harriette)
Who needs sex?
Who needs sex?
It's no fun
It's no fun
He grunts and he gasps like he's on a long run
He's in for a minute then he squirts on your bum
Then he falls asleep as soon as he's done
So who needs sex?

WHY WAS HE BORN SO BEAUTIFUL?
Melody – Itself 

Why was he born so beautiful?
Why was he born at all?
He's no fuckin' use to anyone,
He's no bloody use at all.
They say he's a joy to his mother,
But he's a pain in the asshole to me,
He's fresh as a daisy,
He drives me crazy,
So drink it down, down, down . . . 

WHY WAS SHE BORN A BITCH?
Melody - 1st verse: Itself
2nd verse: My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean 

Why was she born so beautiful?
Why was she born a bitch?
She's no bloody use to anyone,
She's only got one tit.

She ought to be publicly pissed on,
She ought to be publicly shot,
She ought to be tied to a urinal,
And left there to fester and rot.
So drink it down, down, down . .  

Post Down-Down Songs
(sung to hashers taking to long to drink or not paying attention) 

WHY ARE WE WAITING?
Melody - Asdeste Fideles(O'Come All Ye Faithful) 

Why are we waiting,
Could be fornicating (masturbating, etc),
Oh, why are we waiting,
So fucking long, etc . . . 

TO THE SLOW DRINKER:

All this time that you're taking,
I know that you're faking,
We could be masturbating,
I fear.
Now we've run out of song,
And we won't get along,
Until you finish,
That fucking beer! 

ZIGGY-ZAGGY
The purpose of the ziggy-zaggy chant is to point out breaches in circle etiquette - members of the circle surround the offender and repeat chant loudly:

Ziggy-zaggy,  ziggy-zaggy,
Oi,  Oi,  Oi!
Ziggy-zaggy,  ziggy-zaggy,
Oi,  Oi,  Oi!
Ziggy-zaggy,  ziggy-zaggy,
Oi,  Oi,  Oi!

Alternate verses
    Shiggy shaggy, shiggy shaggy---Oi, Oi, Oi!
    Motorcycle, motorcycle---Vroom, Vroom, Vroom!
    Locomotive, locomotive,--Choo, Choo, Choo!
    Helicopter, helicopter,---Whirl, Whirl, Whirl! (or Whop, Whop, Whop!)
    Submarine, submarine---Glug, Glug, Glug!
    Motorcar, motorcar---Beep, Beep, Beep!
    Telephone, telephone---Ring, Ring, Ring!
    Penis, penis---Cum, Cum, Cum! 

HEAD CHANT
(Yelled whenever mistakenly mentions the word “head”)

Head?  Who said head?
    I'll take some of that!
    Oooh-rah!
    And I did, and it was good,
    And there was much rejoicing.
    And then we fucked.  We fucked for hours,
    Uprooting trees, bushes, and flowers.
    Frightening small children and woodland animals.
    We fucked with power tools.
    Swinging from chandeliers standing on stools
    We fucked like Vikings, with horns on our head.
    Head?  Who said head?
    I'll take some of that!
    Oooh-rah! 

Songs for Specific Down-Downs

(Arranged in the order of the circle)

Hares (sung to bring up the hares)
MAYOR OF BAYSWATER'S DAUGHTER
Melody - The Ash Grove                            

 CHORUS:
Leader: And the hairs,
Pack: And the hairs,
Leader: And the hairs,
Pack: And the hairs,
Leader: And the hairs,
Pack: On her dicky-di-doe,
Hang down to her knees.
One black one, one white one,
*And one with a bit of shite on,*
And the hairs on her dicky-di-doe,
Hang down to her knees.

 *VARIATIONS*
and one forty pound strength one
and one I caught a trout on
and one I found on a bar of soap
and one that blocked the storm drain
and one she used as dental floss
and one she uses for macramé
and one dripping in olive oil
and one she towed my car with
and one that smelt of clitty litter
and one to start the mower with
and one they use in gunsights
and one with a drop of piss on
and one covered in algae
and one I start my outboard with
and one I broke a tooth on
and one I found in my mug of beer
and one the crabs are stuck on
and one she winched her Jeep with
and one she marked the trail with
and one she tied her Nikes with
and one she tied her whistle on
and one she roped the calves with
and one she pulled her trailer with
and one they hanged a horse thief with
and one she climbed a cliff with
and one she whipped the orphans with
etc . . .

 VERSES:
I've smelt it, I've felt it,
It's just like a bit of velvet.

I could not believe my eyes,
When I peered down between her thighs.

I she were my daughter,
I'd have her cut them shorter.

I've seen it, I've seen it,
I've lain right in between it.

I stroked 'em and poked 'em,
I rolled 'em and smoked 'em.

You'd need a Welsh coal miner,
To find her vagina.

She lives on the mountain,
and pees like a bloody fountain.

She stayed on a cattle ranch,
And came like a bloody avalanche.

She says she is not a whore,
But she bangs like a shithouse door.

 She lives on malted milkshake,
and roots like a bloody rattlesnake.

She married an Italian,
With balls like a fucking stallion.

She divorced the Italian,
And married the stallion.

She married a Spaniard,
With a prick like a bloody lanyard.

She divorced the Spaniard,
And ran off with the bloody lanyard.

The split of her beaver,
Looks just like June Cleaver's.

She slept with a demon,
Who drowned her with semen.

Her cat's name is Boris,
And it plays with her clitoris.

The aroma it lingers,
It smells like fish fingers.

(She sat/We finished) on the waterfront,
With the waves lapping up and down her cunt.

I've licked it and kissed it,
It tastes like a chocolate biscuit.

You can drive a Morris Minor,
Right up her vagina.

It was always hit-or-miss,
Whether I could find her clitoris.

She went to Arabia,
And got camel drool on her labia.

She stayed in Seattle,
And went down on cattle.

The light is so glitorous,
When it shines off her clitoris.

Her vagina was squishy,
And smelled a bit fishy.

She went with a Hash House Harrier,
Who fucked her but wouldn't marry her.

(MORE HASH VERSES,)
She slept with a Hash House Harriette,
Who played melodies upon her clit.

She wooed the Grand Master,
But he couldn't satisfy her.

Grand Mistress gave her a go,
She used an electric dildo.

Three Joint Masters did sport in concert,
But they couldn't reach her G-spot.

She went out with the RA,
But he proved to be a lousy lay.

She seduced the Song Master,
But he couldn't outlast her.

Hare Raiser did sleep with her,
But got all tangled in her fur.

The hares swived her with great intent,
But they soon were limp and spent.

She depantsed the OnSec,
And scoffed at her tiny clit.

She rogered the Hash Scribe,
And begat an entire tribe.

She stripped for the Beermeister,
He shot off all over her.

 Hash Shyster did groan, oh,
As he serviced her pro bono.

She gave head to the Hash Cash,
And she ejaculated in a flash.

The Snackmeister she tried to lay,
But she came during foreplay.

She mooned the Haberdasher,
Who fainted at the sight of her.

An SCB dove in her muff,
But found he hadn't tongue enough.

She said to the FRB,
"Do it doggie style with me."

The walkers were red and sore,
She shagged them right across the floor.

She had it off with a Ranger,
But he went DOT inside of her.

To a Whiner she took a shiner,
But he cried, "Any one but her."

She took on the entire pack,
She was hot but they were slack.

She was brisk with young (hasher’s name),
But he came much too quickly.

So she tried (hasher’s name),
But he couldn't get it up for her.

She had group sex with the Circle,
Next day our parts turned purple.

 Hares (sung for down down)
SHITTY TRAIL
(to; The Mickey Mouse Club Song)

S, H, I, — T, T, Y
T, R, A, I, L
Shitty Trail, Shitty Trail
The tricky hares gave us crappy trail
I would rather drink some beer,
Than hash your shitty trail.
S, H, I, — T, T, Y
T, R, A, I, L 

First In and Last In
First in and Last In Song

(He/She/They) is/are stupid
(He/She/They) is/are dumb
(He/She/They) come(s) too early
(He/She/They) can not come.

Virgins
WE'VE GOT VIRGINS
Melody - Frère Jacques 

We've got virgins,
We've got virgins,
At our hash,
At our hash,
Gonna get'em drunked up,
Gonna get'em fucked up,
Down the hatch,
Up the ass,
So drink it down, down, down . . .

Virgins
BYE BYE CHERRY
Melody - Bye Bye Blackbird 

Back your ass against the wall,
Here I come, balls and all,
Bye, bye, cherry!

Won't your mother be disgusted,
When she finds your cherry's busted,
Bye, bye, cherry!

Wrap your legs around a little tighter,
I can feel my load is getting lighter,
Shake your ass and wiggle your tits,
Till my little pecker spits,
Cherry, bye bye! 

Milestones
GET A LIFE
Melody- William Tell Overture  
(usually this song will lead into another down-down song)

    Get a life, get a life, get a life
    Life life life
    Get a life, get a life, get a life
    Life life life
    Get a life…… life life life!

Hashus-Interuptus
WHERE WERE YOU LAST WEEK?
Melody - Where Oh Where Were You Last Night (from Hee Haw) 

Where, Oh Where were you last week?
Why did you make us hash all alone?
You Fat Lazy Bastards, You weren't even here.
So we fucked all the virgins and drank all the Beer.

Down, Down, Drink it all Down
Drink it all Down, Drink all of that Beer

You Fat Lazy Bastards, You weren't even here.
So we fucked all the virgins and drank all the Beer.
Drink it down, down, down, down . . .

Hashus-Interuptus
YOU ARE OUR ______
Melody - You Are My Sunshine

You are our _______, our only ______,
You make us happy when skies are bleak.
You'll never know ______, how much we like you,
Please keep coming to Hash ev'ry week.
Drink it down, down, down . . .
　

Returning
RETURNER'S SONG
Melody - It's a Small World After All 

They've returned to us, some from far away,
Some fucking excuse, each of them did say,
As we listen to it,
We know they're full of shit,
They are assholes, after all.

They are assholes, after all,
They are assholes, after all,
They are assholes, after all,
Fuck you all, assholes.
Drink it down, down, down, down . . . etc.

Departing
PISS OFF, YA WANK
Melody - Auld Lang Syne

    Piss off, ya wank, piss off, ya wank,
    Piss off, ya wank, piss off,
    Piss off, ya wank, piss off, ya wank,
    Piss off, ya wank, piss off.

Birthdays
BIRTHDAY SONG
Melody - Happy Birthday to You 

Happy birthday, fuck you,
Happy birthday, fuck you,
Happy birthday, you asshole,
Happy birthday, fuck you.
Drink it down, down, down . . . 

Specific Violations

    Autohashing
AUTOHASH SONG (used to honor autohashers)
Melody - Dear Lord, Won't You Buy Me a Mercedes-Benz (Janis Joplin)
　

(Japanese version)
Dear Lord, won't you give me a ride to the beer,
My friends are all drinking, and I'm stuck out here,
I'll ride in a Honda, Nissan, or Mazda,
If you drive me there I'll throw in a down, down, down, down . . .

(International version)
Dear Lord, won't you give me a ride to the beer,
My friends are all drinking, and I'm stuck out here,
I'll ride in a lorry, rickshaw, or tuk tuk,
If you drive me there I'll throw in a down, down, down, down . . .

(USA version)
Dear Lord, won't you give me a ride to the beer,
My friends are all drinking, and I'm stuck out here,
I'll ride in a Chevy, a Ford or a truck,
If you drive me there I'll throw in a down, down, down, down . . .

No Whistle
NO BLOW SONG  (Used for honoring hashers who have forgotten their whistles)
Melody - Looney Tunes Theme 

You seem somewhat forgetful,
Remind you?  Maybe this'll,
Next time you come, don't be so dumb,
Just bring your fucking whistle!

 Circle Closing Song
INTERNATIONAL HASH HYMN  (Note: gestures accompany words)
Melody - Swing Low, Sweet Chariot 

CHORUS:
Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home,
Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home.

I looked over Jordan and what did I see,
Coming for to carry me home,
A band of angels coming after me,
Coming for to carry me home.

CHORUS:

I'm sometimes up and sometimes down,
Comin' for to carry me home,
But still my soul feels heavenly bound.
Comin' for to carry me home.

 CHORUS:

If you get there before I do,
Coming for to carry me home,
Tell all my friends that I'm coming too,
Coming for to carry me home.

(repeat with variations: humming and motions only, silence and motions only, double-time)

Extended Down-Down Songs
(For those who feel brave or wish to torment the drinkers Arranged alphabetically)

 COME AND SIT ON MY FACE IF YOU LOVE ME (TAKE IT IN YOUR HAN, MRS. MURPHY)
Melody - Red River Valley 

Come and sit on my face, if you love me,
Come and sit on my face, if you care,
And I'll drink from your Red River Valley,
And munch on your curly pubic hairs.

Oh, if I had the wings of an eagle,
And the balls of a hairy baboon,
I would fly to the ends of creation,
And I'd butt-fuck the Man in the Moon.

Oh, take it in the hand, Mrs Murphy,
It feels just like a rolling pin.
But if you roll it between your hands,
It'll take some time to be useful again.

Oh, take it in the mouth, Mrs Murphy,
It only weighs a quarter of a pound.
It's got hairs round its neck like a turkey,
And it spits when you shake it up and down.

Oh, take it between the breasts, Mrs Murphy,
And look it staight in its one eye.
It will lie at peace between your bosom,
Until finally milk-tears you cry.

 Oh, place it between your legs, Mrs Murphy,
It is just aching to crawl inside.
It has a helmet on its head like a soldier,
And it will shoot all its ammo, then die.

Oh, but never touch  (hasher's name)'s, Mrs Murphy,
It seems his is covered with scabs.
His has warts all over like a horny toad,
And is protected by an army of crabs.

HARRIETTES, THEY PLAY ONE
Melody - This Old Man 

Harriettes, they play one,
All they want to do is cum,

CHORUS:
With a knick knack, slap her ass, poke her with my bone,
This drunk hare will stumble home.

Harriettes, they play two,
We just want to speckle you,

Harriettes, they play three,
Won't you swallow my cum for me,

Harriettes, they play four,
We like to see you on all fours,

Harriettes, they play five,
If you don't swallow you'll get hives, 

Harriettes, they play six,
We just want to slap you with our dicks,

Harriettes, they play seven,
But they all just wish it was eleven,

Harriettes, they play eight,
We all know you masturbate,

Harriettes, they play nine,
All they do is whinge and whine,

 Harriettes, they play ten,
We're not boys, we're harrier men,

Harriettes, they play eleven,
But all they can handle is only seven.

HASHER MEN (AND WOMEN)
Melody - This Old Man

HARRIETTES' VERSES:
White Snake men, they play one,
They think they have all the fun.

 CHORUS:
With a knick knack, paddy whack, give themselves a bone,
White Snake men have sex alone.

White Snake men, they play two,
They can't get it up to screw.

White Snake men, they play three,
They think they get sex for free.

White Snake men, they play four,
They can't get it up to score.

White Snake men, they play five,
They don't have enough sex drive.

White Snake men, they play six,
Little men with little dicks.

White Snake men, they play seven,
Masturbation is their heaven.

White Snakemen, they play eight,
They can't get their dicks in straight.

White Snake men, they play nine,
They take theirs up from behind.

White Snake men, they play ten,
Little boys who think they're men.

HARRIERS' VERSES:
White Snake women, they play one,
They don't know how to get it on.

CHORUS:
With a knick knack, paddy whack, give themselves a tickle,
White Snake women use a pickle.

White Snake women, they play two,
They say, "Not now, I've got the flu."

White Snake women, they play three,
They say, "Not now, I've got to pee."

White Snake women, they play four,
They say, "Not now, who's at the door?"

White Snake women, they play five,
They'll cut your dick off with a knife.

White Snake women, they play six,
They're never satisfied with our pricks.

White Snake women, they play seven,
Life without sex is their idea of heaven.

White Snake women, they play eight,
They always seem to have a headache.

White Snake women, they play nine,
Their sex lives are in decline.

White Snake women, they play ten,
If they were better looking they might get some men. 

HASHERS GO RUNNING ONE BY ONE
Melody - When Johnny Comes Marching Home 

The hashers go running one by one, On-On! On-On!
The hashers go running one by one, On-On! On-On!
The hashers go running one by one,
The little one stops to shoot his cum.
And they all go running down to the ground
To get out of the shite, boom, boom, boom!

Two by two - have a screw
Three by three - take a pee
Four by four - slam a whore
Five by five - go muff dive
Six by six - pick up tricks
Seven by seven - pinch eleven
Eight by eight - masturbate
Nine by nine - do a line
Ten by ten - get laid again

I AM A HASHER, HOW 'BOUT YOU?
Melody - Yankee Doodle Dandy 

I'm a dirty smelly hasher, chasing hares is what I do.
I check down trails in the afternoon, drink by the light of the moon.
I love mud and blood and brambles, toxic waste and smelly goo.
Dirty shoes and bloody knees and a real bad case of scabies,
I am a hasher, how 'bout you?

I'm a drunken beer soaked hasher, draining kegs is what I do.
For breakfast I must have some oatmeal stout, for lunch it's a Guinness or two.
For dinner I must do some thinking, Sam's or Pete's or maybe microbrew.
But when I'm hashing give me Schaeffers, give me Busch or Miller,

Cause I am a drunken hasher. Are you a drunken hasher?
I am a drunken hasher too.

I'm a horny sex-starved hasher, chasing tail is what I do.
I came to Iwakuni just to get a lay, ended up (screwing a ewe) or (with PayPerView),
I love kinky sex and spankings, naval shots and butt chugs too.
}Give me dildoes, give me butt plugs, give me whips and bondage.
Cause I am a horny hasher! Are you a horny hasher?
I am a horny hasher too!

 I PUT MY HAND
Melody - When Johnny Comes Marching Home Again 

I put my hand upon her toe, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my hand upon her toe, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my hand upon her toe,
She said, "Hey Hasher, you're way too low,
Get in, get out, quit fuckin' about!"
Ya Ho! Ya Ho! Ya Ho!

I put my hand upon her knee, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my hand upon her knee, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my hand upon her knee,
She said, "Hey Hasher, you're teasin' me,
Get in, get out, quit fuckin' about!"
Ya Ho! Ya Ho! Ya Ho!

I put my hand upon her tit, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my hand upon her tit, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my hand upon her tit,
She said, "Hey Hasher, you're squeezin' it,
Get in, get out, quit fuckin' about!"
Ya Ho! Ya Ho! Ya Ho!

I put my hand upon her twat, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my hand upon her twat, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my hand upon her twat,
She said, "Hey Hasher, you've hit the spot,
Get in, get out, quit fuckin' about!"
Ya Ho! Ya Ho! Ya Ho!

Now she lies in a wooden box, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
Now she lies in a wooden box, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
Now she lies in a wooden box,
From sucking too many Hasher's cocks,
Get in, get out, quit fuckin' about!
Ya Ho! Ya Ho! Ya Ho! 

I PUT MY LIPS
Melody - When Johnny Comes Marching Home

I put my lips upon his toe, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my lips upon his toe, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my lips upon his toe,
He said, "Hey Harriette, you're way too low,
Suck in, suck out, quit fuckin' about!"
Ya Ho! Ya Ho! Ya Ho!

I put my lips upon his knee, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my lips upon his knee, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my lips upon his knee,
He said, "Hey Harriette, you're teasin' me,
Suck in, suck out, quit fuckin' about!"
Ya Ho! Ya Ho! Ya Ho!

I put my lips upon his tit, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my lips upon his tit, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my lips upon his tit,
He said, "Hey Harriette, I've just been bit,
Suck in, suck out, quit fuckin' about!"
Ya Ho! Ya Ho! Ya Ho!

I put my lips upon his prick, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my lips upon his prick, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
I put my lips upon his prick,
He said, "Hey Harriet, you're really sick,
Suck in, suck out, quit fuckin' about!"
Ya Ho! Ya Ho! Ya Ho!

Now he lies in a wooden box, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
Now he lies in a wooden box, Ya Ho! Ya Ho!
Now he lies in a wooden box,
From a severe case of small cox,
Suck in, suck out, quit fuckin' about!
Ya Ho! Ya Ho! Ya Ho!

 MASTURBATION SONG
Melody - Funiculi, Funicula

HARRIERS VERSES
Last night I stayed up late and masturbated,
It felt so good, I knew it would.
Last night I stayed up late to masturbate,
It felt so nice, I did it twice.
You should have seen me on the short strokes,
It felt so grand, I used my hand,
And you should have seen me on the long strokes,
It felt so neat, I used my feet.
Shake it, break it, beat it on the floor,
Smash it, bash it, thrust it through the door,
Some people seem to think that fornication's grand,
But for all-around enjoyment, I prefer to use my hand!

HARRIETTE'S VERSES
Next door, I laid and masturbated,
It did me good, I knew it would.
All night, the bed springs they vibrated,
I think it's canny, to rub my fanny.
You should have seen me on the short strokes,
It felt so grand, she used her hand.
You should have seen me on the long strokes,
Around and round, and up and down.
Eased it, teased it, slid along the floor,
Rubbed it, scrubbed it, tickled it to the core.
Some people say that being fucked is very grand,
But for personal enjoyment, I would rather use her hand.

ODE TO A HASHER
Melody - Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star 

Starkle Starkle little twink,
Who the hell are you I think,
I'm not as drunk as thinkle peep,
I'm just a little slort of sheep,
A few brewkies make a guy,
Fool so feelish, don't know why,
Really don't know who's me yet,
The drunker I stay the longer I get,
So just one more to fill my cup,
I've all day sober to Sunday up.

 The Lassie with the Black Hairy Assey

Here's to the lassie with the black hairy assey,
Who was lifting up her kilty at the Iwakuni White Snake Hash.

Bagpipe sounds:
(Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah
Nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah)

Then there was the jockey with his upstanding cocky,
Who was riding on the lassie with the black hairy assey,
Who was lifting up her kilty at the Iwakuni White Snake Hash.

(bagpipe)

Then there was the Yankee who was wanking in his hanky,
At the thought of the jockey with the upstanding cocky,
Who was riding on the lassie with the black hairy assey,
Who was lifting up her kilty at the Iwakuni White Snake Hash.

(bagpipe)

Then there was the queerie who was leering through his beery,
At the sight of the Yankee who was wanking in his hanky,
At the thought of the jockey with the upstanding cocky,
Who was riding on the lassie with the black hairy assey,
Who was lifting up her kilty at the Iwakuni White Snake Hash.

(bagpipe)

Then there was the Harlot making money in the car lot,
To support the queerie who was leering through his beery,
At the sight of the Yankee who was wanking in his hanky,
At the thought of the jockey with the upstanding cocky,
Who was riding on the lassie with the black hairy assey,
Who was lifting up her kilty at the Iwakuni White Snake Hash.

(bagpipe)

Then there was the Hasher who was posing as a flasher,
Hustling customers from the Harlot making money in the car lot,
To support the queerie who was leering through his beery,
At the sight of the Yankee who was wanking in his hanky,
At the thought of the jockey with the upstanding cocky,
Who was riding on the lassie with the black hairy assey,
Who was lifting up her kilty at the Iwakuni White Snake Hash.

(bagpipe)

Then there was the Wenchy doing down-downs on a benchy,
Slaking the thirst of the Hasher who was posing as a flasher,
Hustling customers from the Harlot making money in the car lot,
To support the queerie who was leering through his beery,
At the sight of the Yankee who was wanking in his hanky,
At the thought of the jockey with the upstanding cocky,
Who was riding on the lassie with the black hairy assey,
Who was lifting up her kilty at the Iwakuni White Snake Hash.

(bagpipe)

Now the moral of this ditty is when in San Francisco City,
And you're with your favorite girlie, chasing hairs all short and curly,
Just remember to take her hashing and to give her a good bashing,
And to avoid the Wenchy doing down-downs on a benchy,
Making money for the Hasher who was posing as a flasher,
Hustling customers from the Harlot making money in the car lot,
To support the queerie who was leering through his beery,
At the sight of the Yankee who was wanking in his hanky,
At the thought of the jockey with the upstanding cocky,
Who was riding on the lassie with the black hairy assey,
Who was lifting up her kilty at the Iwakuni White Snake Hash.

(bagpipe) 

SPECIAL SONGS
Warm Up Songs
(Usually sung before the run)

FATHER ABRAHAM
Melody - Itself

Leader: Father Abraham had seven sons,
Seven sons had Father Abraham,
And he never smiled,
And he never cried,
All he did was go like this - With a right!

All (shout/actions): With a right! (extend right arm)

Leader: Father Abraham had seven sons,
Seven sons had Father Abraham,
And he never smiled,
And he never cried,
All he did was go like this - With a right! 

All (shout/actions): With a right! (extend right arm)
Leader: And a left!
All (shout/actions): And a left! (extend left arm) 

More verses/actions:
With another right! (extend right leg)
With another left! (extend left leg)
And a HEEEE! (hump pelvis)
And a HUUHH! (turn around, drop pants, moon pack) 

HANKY PANKY
Melody - Hokey Pokey

You give the right eye wink
You give the left eye wink
You give the "come here" wink
And he buys us both a drink

CHORUS:
You do the hanky panky
Get his trousers down
That's what it's all about

You do the top lip lick
You do the bottom lip lick
You give a little giggle'
Cause he thinks you'll lick his prick

You put your right tit out
You put your left tit out
Nipples getting harder
So you shake them all about

You put your right cheek out
You put your left cheek out
You give a little wobble
Watch his eyes pop out 

You put your right leg out
You put your left leg out
Spread them at the knees
So he can see what it's about

You put the right hip out
You put the left hip out
Grab him by the ballocks
And you squeeze until he spouts

You put your pelvis in
You put your pelvis out
Go a little faster
And you grind it all about

You give the right ear groan
You give the left ear groan
Grind a little faster
'Cause he's going to drop his load

You give a right cheek kiss
You give a left cheek kiss
Hate to be a liar
But you tell him it was bliss

We've done the hanky panky
Got his trousers down
So fuck off!

 MONDAY IS A WANKING DAY 

Leader: Today is Monday!
All